WTF

share your WTFs

http://www.stamfordadvocate.com/news/article/Police-Father-injured-giving-driving-lesson-to-11747190.php

NEW HAVEN, Conn. (AP) — Police in Connecticut say a man was critically injured when he was pinned between a car and a tree as he was giving his 11-year-old daughter a driving lesson.

New Haven police say the 25-year-old man jumped out of the car and tried to stop it as it reversed toward a house on Wednesday. The car crashed through a fence and struck a gas line before pinning him.

The man was taken to a hospital in critical condition. The girl was not injured. Several nearby homes were evacuated as crews tried to stop the gas leak.

I don't get why people think they can stop a car. Let the car crash. It has safety features.

So the guy was 14 when he had the child? I guess it happens, but that seems a stretch.

I live about 20 minutes north of New Haven.. Was definitely an lol moment. Not sure how he thought he was the incredible Hulk and capable of stoping a moving car with his bare hands...

One way on the express bus route that picks up near my building costs $4.25. wtf

@allereli I just cracked up when I read that

@viekn said in WTF:

So the guy was 14 when he had the child? I guess it happens, but that seems a stretch.

Could also be wife's child from a previous marriage, or adopted when he was young.

Or he had the child when he was 14. He DID think that giving an 11 year-old a driving lesson was a good idea in the first place...

@archsenex said in WTF:

@viekn said in WTF:

So the guy was 14 when he had the child? I guess it happens, but that seems a stretch.

Could also be wife's child from a previous marriage, or adopted when he was young.

Or he had the child when he was 14. He DID think that giving an 11 year-old a driving lesson was a good idea in the first place...

Good point. I didn't think of those possibilities.

Pfft. If that guy was from Jersey he woulda did it right. I learned to drive at 11 too. No lessons! They just gave us the keys to the field car and said "Go nuts". You just drive the field car and crash it a bunch until you learn to not crash it. Then you learn that you can crash it on purpose for fun sometimes too. It's a field car! Just don't hit the cows. They leave dents that don't buff out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKNvf3HK70Y

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPomflAl05Q

http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/20361031/chick-fil-atlanta-falcons-home-closed-sundays

Atlanta Falcons fans won't get their Chick-fil-A fix at the team's new Mercedes-Benz Stadium for most of the team's games, as the restaurant's stand will be closed on Sunday.

The franchise famous for its chicken sandwich is closed on Sundays, and only one of the team's eight home games isn't on a Sunday -- a Thursday night matchup against the Seattle Seahawks on Dec. 7.

http://wjla.com/news/nation-world/woman-accused-of-driving-drunk-with-unbuckled-toddler-in-back-seat

Lerma took two breath tests. The results, according to the sheriff's office, registered a blood alcohol content of .200 and .187. The legal limit in Florida is .08.

The woman told deputies at the scene she took Percocet, Xanax, and drank two fireballs.

I think a bee stung her butthole.

@mogonis Is that the face you made when it happened to you?

I think that's the face anyone makes when that happens.

http://www.npr.org/2017/08/16/543697015/aw-shoot-wisconsin-man-accidentally-fires-nail-gun-into-heart-but-hes-fine

Bergeson accidentally shot a nail through his chest and into his heart ... then drove himself to the ER, where open-heart surgery removed the 3 1/2-inch nail and saved >his life.

Damn, that had the makings to become a real Iron Man.

@allereli Maybe she has Grave's Disease. That looks like serious exophthalmus

got stuck in an elevator for the first time ever just now.

Have you gotten out yet?

@tenser said in WTF:

Have you gotten out yet?

oh we were only in there 10 minutes. my coworker and I didn't even have our phones with us since we just went down to the Chinese restaurant in our building that everyone goes to when it rains. We teased our other coworker who we bumped into for not ordering over the phone as we walked out. He made it back before us.

Easy. You keep the red on the right when you're returning. Bro do you even boat?

don't get me wrong, I'm not mad. But if I were a Rays fan, I don't think I would consider this a "neutral site"

http://m.yankees.mlb.com/news/article/253183832/yankees-rays-series-moved-to-citi-field/?topicId=27118390

https://www.cnet.com/news/equifax-argentina-vulnerability-admin/?ftag=COS-05-10-aaa0a&linkId=42196486

X-Post from the PC

Equifax reportedly used 'admin' as password in Argentina

Also this: https://www.hollywoodlanews.com/equifax-chief-security-officer/

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/toronto/fake-degree-toronto-investigation-1.4287347

this fucking sock

https://live.washingtonpost.com/carolyn-hax-live-20170915.html?hpid=hplocal-newshax-12pm%3Ahomepage%2Fstory

Q: My Mom Poisoned My Girlfriend My girlfriend "Cleo" is allergic to seafood but does not carry an epi-pen because “It’s not that type of reaction,” but she always asks lots of questions about the ingredients and how the food is cooked. My mom always finds the questions insulting and believed Cleo was making up the allergy since she doesn’t carry the epi-pen. This past Labor Day at my family BBQ, Cleo did her usual questioning before eating. Maybe 30 minutes later she started complaining that her face itched. She took Benedryl but she turned red, and her eyes began swelling. We had to go to the ER for a cortisone shot. As we’re getting in the car, my mom confessed she fried the fish and chicken in the same oil and lied when Cleo asked. She admitted she planned to prove Cleo’s allergy was fake. My mom apologized and is paying the ER bill. Even so, Cleo called my mom a monster and wants nothing to do with her. She also broke up with me because I shouldn’t have to choose between her and mom. She won’t consider a compromise like eating before visits. Is there anyway to get passed my anger at my mom and get Cleo back?

Whoa. That is some next level ego shit for needing to be right.

"She also broke up with me because I shouldn’t have to choose between her and mom. She won’t consider a compromise like eating before visits."

somehow i feel like the 'okay yes my mom tried to kill you but let's be reasonable and compromise' conversation was a key factor in the breakup

She broke up with you because she wants babies that don't have a psycho grandma with boundary issues.

the mom's lucky she's not getting rung up on criminal charges.

http://www.new.swopusa.org/2017/08/11/call-to-actionpress-release-swop-usa-stands-in-direct-opposition-of-disguised-internet-censorship-bill-sesta-s-1963-call-your-state-representatives-and-tell-them-to-fight/

Senator Rob Portman has introduced a bill to congress that would be detrimental to Sex Workers, small businesses, and tech giants alike. The Stop Enabling Sex Trafficking Act or SESTA, S. 1963, however cleverly titled, is not at all what it claims to be. It boasts of being the answer to uncovering and punishing those engaged in sex trafficking online but what it actually is about is internet censorship. It is an attempt to remove the protection websites are currently offered under Section 230 of The Communications Decency Act. Section 230 is in place to uphold freedom of expression on the internet and protects websites from being liable for what a third party might post outside of their knowledge. If this bill passes, any person or business online could be subject to civil or state penalties if the authorities “believe” there is any trafficking or condoning of trafficking on your site. How is that determined? What activities will they consider illegal online? What about consenting adults engaging in sexual online courtship? What about our favorite fetish and cruising sites? What about individuals who enjoy posting nude or nude implied photos of themselves online? Would we then have to be worried about our naked photos being considered illegal solicitation?

I get so many robo/spam calls now that I habitually swipe to hang up on all of my calls.

http://www.bravotv.com/top-chef/blogs/pizza-topped-with-halloween-candy-corn-is-going-viral?cid=socdgfbFeasttopchef

@allereli who ever did that should shot in the head.

@sabotage said in WTF:

@allereli who ever did that should shot in the head.

this guy: https://twitter.com/TheRealAsswolf/status/909617803895857154

Posted by a pregnant friend with another young child:

Our dream home in _ turned out to be a former crack house and addicts started showing up and as you can guess were more than disappointed when they realized their dealer moved out. And so we came to realize this house wasn't meant to be and we started packing up the life we just settled into.

http://wjla.com/news/offbeat/woman-arrested-in-va-accused-of-1990-killer-clown-shooting-of-her-future-husbands-wife

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. (AP) -- Police in Florida say they've arrested a woman accused of dressing up like a clown 27 years ago and fatally shooting the wife of her future husband.

@allereli said in WTF:

Posted by a pregnant friend with another young child:

Our dream home in _ turned out to be a former crack house and addicts started showing up and as you can guess were more than disappointed when they realized their dealer moved out. And so we came to realize this house wasn't meant to be and we started packing up the life we just settled into.

Vancouver! This is a guessing game, right?

that's Steven Seagal!

http://www.guacamoley.com/the-scoop/2017/09/28/Z1qUe1N/steven-seagal-nfl-protests

@allereli He thinks hes a god with special powers. He is super crazy, so nothing surprises me from him.

@sabotage said in WTF:

@allereli He thinks hes a god with special powers. He is super crazy, so nothing surprises me from him.

yeah, and he also went full John Travolta

I thought I knew my schedule for October. WAS WRONG!

OJ: Too crazy for Florida

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/2735992-oj-simpson-not-welcome-to-live-in-florida-after-prison-release-says-state-ag

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2017/09/30/a-model-decided-to-tattoo-her-eyeball-shes-now-partially-blind-and-in-excruciating-pain/

The day of the procedure, purple ink oozed out of her eye and trickled down her cheek. The next day, the eye was swollen shut, and eventually became painfully infected. Three weeks later, the internal swelling remained and doctors told her she was at risk of going permanently blind in the affected eye.

She already has about 25 tattoos on her body, and has undergone another risky procedure to split her tongue to make it appear forked. So Gallinger said getting a sclera tattoo seemed like the next step. . . . But Gallinger hadn’t done enough research and gave in too soon to pressure from her boyfriend, she said.

During the procedure, Gallinger said he made many errors. He did not mix the ink with any saline. He used a large needle instead of a small one, which went too deep into the eye. And instead of doing several small dosages, Gallinger just took one large injection during a 10-minute sitting.

@allereli that one still gives me the heebie jeebies

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/acts-of-faith/wp/2017/10/04/santa-dead-archaeologists-say/?utm_term=.1fb090f6e507

Archaeologists in southern Turkey say they have discovered the tomb of the original Santa Claus, also known as St. Nicholas, beneath his namesake church near the Mediterranean Sea.

Saint Nicholas of Myra (now Demre) was known for his anonymous gift-giving and generosity. People believed he’d put coins in the shoes of anyone who left them out for him on his feast day, Dec. 6.

http://www.snopes.com/2017/10/06/racist-daycare-letter/

I need a Silkwood shower after reading that.

That reads like bullshit. I'd be surprised if it is real.

@sabotage said in WTF:

That reads like bullshit. I'd be surprised if it is real.

http://www.lehighvalleylive.com/lehigh-county/index.ssf/2017/10/daycareletterblack_employee.html

@allereli I'm not saying they didn't receive it, only that it reads like someone who doesn't hold those beliefs wrote it for their own "gain".

http://www.nhregister.com/news/article/Knowingly-infecting-others-with-HIV-is-no-longer-12265119.php

California lawmakers have passed legislation to reduce the penalty for those who knowingly or intentionally expose others to HIV without their knowledge, rolling back a law that mostly affected sex workers.

So hot.

Not.

That is like the black teeth and crooked teeth thing in Japan. Nasty.

http://digg.com/video/french-bulldog-snacking-in-costume

Where was this Tanaka on Old Timer's Day?

http://wjla.com/news/offbeat/oklahoma-woman-who-married-mother-pleads-guilty-to-incest

Patricia Spann has said she thought the marriage was legal because she had lost custody of her daughter and two sons years ago and isn't listed on their birth certificates.

Prosecutors say Patricia Spann also married one of her sons. That marriage was annulled in 2010.

@allereli said in WTF:

http://wjla.com/news/offbeat/oklahoma-woman-who-married-mother-pleads-guilty-to-incest

Patricia Spann has said she thought the marriage was legal because she had lost custody of her daughter and two sons years ago and isn't listed on their birth certificates.

Prosecutors say Patricia Spann also married one of her sons. That marriage was annulled in 2010.

Da fuq?

@maetriks Her:

I just can't even. Like, were the kids taken away because of abuse or something? How could someone think this was okay?

and THE MOTHER PLEADED NOT GUILTY!!!

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/speaking-of-science/wp/2017/11/21/this-man-is-about-to-launch-himself-in-his-homemade-rocket-to-prove-the-earth-is-flat/?utm_term=.d4f1fd2815c9

"This man is about to launch himself in his homemade rocket to prove the Earth is flat"

Hughes promised the flat-Earth community that he would expose the conspiracy with his steam-powered rocket, which will launch from a heavily modified mobile home — though he acknowledged that he still had much to learn about rocket science.

@sabotage I'm excited to read his obituary next week.

http://wjla.com/news/local/man-fakes-medical-license-for-five-years-former-patients-are-now-victims

For five years, Dr. Charles Akoda delivered babies and prenatal care at Prince George's County Hospital, but Jeff Abell reports what he also delivered were credentials, which he admits were fake.

Earlier this year, a judge sentenced Akoda to six months in a federal prison.

Only 6 months?!

If he was still good at the job, sure why not? Probably shouldn't have gotten any time considering all the other nonmedically licensed bullshit that swarms around childbirth.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/amazon-driver-caught-video-pooping-front-home-article-1.3670807

A family in California was left in shock after they discovered an Amazon delivery driver left a disgusting package outside their home on Tuesday.

The unidentified woman, who is a contracted driver for Amazon, was caught on Nemy Bautista's surveillance camera squatting at the driveway of his Sacramento County home and pooping into a gutter.

The driver tried to hide behind the passenger's side door of the U-Haul truck she was driving, but the act was all caught on camera.

@sabotage said in WTF:

The unidentified woman, who is a contracted driver for Amazon, was caught on Nemy Bautista’s surveillance camera squatting at the driveway of his Sacramento County home and pooping into a gutter.

At least she tried to go in the gutter. I used to condemn people like this, then I got UC, so maybe she has an issue like that. There's no waiting until you get home.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2017/12/01/a-man-collapsed-with-do-not-resuscitate-tattooed-on-his-chest-doctors-didnt-know-what-to-do/?tid=pm_pop

Doctors in Miami faced an unusual ethical dilemma when an unconscious, deteriorating patient was brought into the emergency room with the words “Do Not Resuscitate” across his chest.

The 70-year-old man was taken earlier this year to Jackson Memorial Hospital, where doctors made their startling discovery: a chest tattoo that seemed to convey the patient's end-of-life wishes. The word “Not” was underlined, and the tattoo included a signature.

@allereli from the video, she didn't try to go in the gutter.

@sabotage said in WTF:

@allereli from the video, she didn't try to go in the gutter.

after what I told you, does it honestly matter?

http://wjla.com/news/local/driver-involved-in-3-car-hit-and-run-va-crash-caught-after-running-away-from-scene-naked

@allereli That apparently happened a mile from my office.

here's the follow-up story to that: http://wjla.com/news/local/after-ramming-vehicles-attacking-with-cutting-tool-naked-man-found-in-drainage-ditch

Dude was jerking off with a cutting tool in his hand?

another:

http://myfox8.com/2017/12/14/mom-arrested-after-son-has-323-hospital-visits-13-major-surgeries/

Why are these doctors performing unnecessary surgeries? I hope the father goes after them.

Kaylene Bowen was arrested on Dec. 6 and charged with injury to a child. The 34-year-old woman claimed her 8-year-old son Christopher was dying from a rare genetic disorder and was in need of a transplant due to lung cancer.

Christopher’s father, Ryan Crawford, said he tried to convince family court judges that his son was not sick, but they sided with Bowen.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/12/13/woman-disfigured-lovers-face-acid-disguise-murdered-husband/

Woman disfigured her lover's face with acid to disguise him as her murdered husband

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-intersect/wp/2017/12/30/more-trouble-for-the-nigerian-prince-louisiana-police-say-they-caught-scams-middle-man/

Police say 67-year-old Michael Neu, who lives outside New Orleans, served as a middle man in hundreds of fraudulent financial transactions and wired money to co-conspirators in Nigeria. Neu has been charged with 269 counts of wire fraud and money laundering after an 18-month investigation, the Slidell Police Department said Thursday.

http://www.newsweek.com/penis-whitening-laser-procedure-goes-viral-thailand-770962

Thailand is going way overboard with the whitening, as if it weren't bad enough already

I have issues and concerns.

FB post by my dad:

my new A.I.Bluetooth refrigerator keeps messaging me that her dozen eggs are ready for insemination....post your favorite A.I. JOKE

http://www.statesman.com/news/crime--law/texas-judge-interrupts-jury-says-god-told-him-defendant-not-guilty/ZRdGbT7xPu7lc6kMMPeWKL/

https://www.rawstory.com/2018/01/camel-beauty-pageant-kicks-12-animals-botox/

With a prize money total of around $57 million, it is no surprise that around 30,000 camels have been entered in the show, but the month-long event has already run into controversy.

“They use Botox for the lips, the nose, the upper lips, the lower lips and even the jaw,” Ali al-Mazrouei, 31, whose father breeds camels, told the Emirates’ The National. “It makes the head more inflated so when the camel comes it’s like, ‘Oh look at how big is that head is. It has big lips, a big nose’.”